HAZARDOUS MATERIALS BULLETIN part one

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  • #61831
    *Lassie*
    Member

    HAZARDOUS MATERIALS BULLETIN

    Element: Woman

    Symbol: Wo

    Discoverer: Adam

    Atomic Mass: Accepted at 53.6kg but known to vary from 40 – 200kg

    Occurrences: Copious quantities in all urban areas

    Physical Properties:

    1. Surface usually covered with painted film
    2. Boils at nothing, freezes without known reason.
    3. Melts if given special treatment.
    4. Bitter if incorrectly used.
    5. Found in various stages from virginal metal to common ore.
    6. Yields if pressure applied in correct places.

    Chemical Composition:

    1. Has great affinity for Gold, Silver and a range of other precious substances.
    2. Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances.
    3. May explode spontaneously without prior warning and for no known reason.
    4. Insoluble in liquids but activity increases greatly by saturation in alcohol.
    5. Most powerful money reducing agent known to man.

    Common Uses:

    1. Highly ornamental especially in sports cars.
    2. Can be a great aid to relaxation.
    3. Very effective cleaning agent.

    Tests:

    1. Pure specimen turns rosy pink when caught in natural state.
    2. Turns green when placed at side of a better specimen.

    Hazards:

    1. Highly dangerous except in expert hands.
    2. Illegal to possess more than one, although several can be maintained in different locations as long as specimens do not come into contact with each other.

    #113638

    😀 😀 😀 thats a good one and very true ;D

    #113639

    LOL, thats very good  😀

    #113640
    kizkiznobite
    Member

    exc…. ;D ;D ;D

    #113641
    *Nat*
    Member

    PMSL Brill  😀  😀 Love this one  😀

    5. Found in various stages from virginal metal to common ore.

    #113642
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Brilliant  ;D

    #113643
    xtine
    Member

    😀 can’t wait to read Part 2 now  ;D

    #113644

    Roflol brilliant!!  ;D

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